Faith

Don’t worry, love.

Your star is too bright to dim.

Posted in Personal, Photo

Faith in what will be

My life is in a slight state of turmoil these days – bird leaving the nest and stuff – and I have been swept away by the events. The words follow and flow come to mind often. Fortunately I’m a good swimmer, so don’t worry! 😉

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But now the flow slowed down to a trickle and I’m able to focus again. On the (almost) here, the (almost) now:

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for a larger image, please click the photos

My baby son (easily two heads taller than me) is coming home this Saturday for a few days to celebrate carnival. I will finally be able to give him that hug I’ve been dying to give him since he unexpectedly left three weeks – which feel like three months – ago. And that kick in the butt. 😀

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Thank you, Sonia Ricotti, for sharing this splendid advice.

Posted in Haiku, Personal, Photo, Poems

Job Interview

There are times when you just have to follow your own, new road, no matter what happens to the comfortable bus you’re on. I got out and tried to take a different path, but it didn’t work out. So now I have to wait for the next ride. And you know what? It feels good to have tried. Some day I WILL get there! 😀

~

thorns will never block

my path towards potent bud

which will bloom next time!

~

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~ click the photo for a larger image ~

Posted in Nature, Photo, Poems

Confirmation

 – prompt of this week: Confirmation

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~

Out here I feel your

blessed touch in bush and tree

Goddess, I believe…

~

Haiku & photo © Marion


Posted in Inspiration, Personal

Unbeliever

WordPress has sent this post tickle today: Write about something you used to believe, but don’t anymore. What changed?

For a long time now I have lost my faith, my conviction that good will always prevail over bad.

Things have happened, big and small. Tsunamis that wipe hundreds, thousands of innocent people from the face of the earth. Earthquakes trapping victims underneath tons of debris. Good people who become incurably ill. Friends who lose their darling little angel of 2,5 years old to liver cancer. My sweet sister losing her unborn daughter years ago while she was eager to live. One day, ONE day earlier and she would have been a healthy child. A female student of our university who was killed in a car crash this weekend, hit by a drunk driver and dragged along for 60 meters. He took off without a scratch, parked his car a couple of streets further and tried to escape. One of our own students losing her dad two years ago, and this week her mother. A co-worker who fought bravely against cancer, was declared healthy and now is in grave danger again. Yes, you could say I lost my faith that good will prevail.

Why would God, if there is a God, let this happen? Of course people have to fight for the quality of their lives, to get somewhere. Nothings comes for free does it? But why the little ones? They haven’t even had the time to do something wrong, they never got the chance. Why did this young girl have to die in such a horrible way, concentrating on her study, finding her way in life, in love. Standing on her own. To be destroyed in the blink of an eye. Why are three children growing up without parents now, the care of her younger brother and sister weighing heavily on the shoulders of our student. Why is that? Are these children bad? Were their parents bad? It is all so very unfair. I would love and I hope that there is a God who is keeping watch over us. But I do not believe this to be true.

Still all of this did not destroy my strong belief that it is good to do good, to be positive whenever you can. To see every little ray of sun. To treasure the little things in life. To take the time to appreciate what you’ve got in stead of longing for things that are not yours. To admire courage and beauty. To greet each day with a smile, chin up and simply go for it. To be thankful for love, family and friends. And to share and spread joy. I believe in the goodness of many people. That there is more to this world than the eye can see. That there are guardian angels, souls of our beloved deceased who are keeping a close eye on us.

I am both unbeliever and believer.

This post is written with high strung emotions barely kept in check, so please forgive me if I have hurt someone with my words.

~Mar

Posted in Personal

They Will Become A Memory In The Future

Dear Mar,

Don’t be alarmed. You’re not going mad. And I’m not mad either. No, it isn’t a cruel joke or a prank of your friends. Please bear with me and hear me out. It will help you through the rough times you’re going through right now.

What do I know about your rough times? Well love, everything, simply everything. You see, I AM you, sending you this message from a future, ten years from now. Save this letter for the evenings when pain and loneliness threaten to overwhelm you. When despair and doubt strike hard. When your heart is about to break from crying throughout the night. Then read this and let it sooth you. Because there IS life after a divorce.

I know you worry so much about your children. How will they cope with the separation, will it affect their future and trust in life? Be at ease, in ten years they have grown into tall young men who love life. Men who have self confidence and a good sense of justice. They won’t be party animals, but they do have faith in themselves and have fun. Your sons will find their own way in life and you will guide them. And love them more and more each day. Like I do.

You doubt your ability to stand on your own, but this is unnecessary my dear. Your family and friends will help you whenever you need advice. They will come over when something is amiss. One of them will even bring you forty beautiful roses on your fortieth birthday, because he wants you to smile. And you will learn about taxes, mortgages and house maintenance. You won’t like it but you will learn.

Which leads me to the financial part. This has been keeping you awake at night. Have trust in your employer, for he will give you the chance to work longer. Your salary, complemented with your alimony, will enable you and your kids to stay in the house they grew up in.

But the most important thing you need to know right now is that your intuition is right. Your intuition that has been screaming for years is right. Do not doubt your decision to end this marriage. You have fought long enough, hard enough. It just wasn’t meant to be. Your unhappiness will only deepen if you go on and I don’t want that to happen to you. Better to be alone on your own, than to be lonely in company. This is what your heart is telling you right now, so listen to it!

You will go through bad and even worse times, through unpleasant and hurtful events. But you will get out of this much stronger. The sparkle will come back to your eyes, you will be your merry old enthusiastic self again. You will explore new areas and do new and exciting things. And you will find love again. But that is something for a distant future.

For now, be strong and have faith dearest Mar. You will make it through these difficult times, together with your sons, your family and your friends. So embrace and accept the loneliness and pain in the certainty that they will ease. They will become a memory in the future.

Yours, with love,
~Mar